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Anal sex is one of the most taboo forms of sexual play commonly practiced. Long a source of societal shame and discomfort, many people feel the anus is off-limits so it's embarrassing for some people to admit they like having their anus touched or stimulated. But there's really no reason to be embarrassed. Anal play has long been a part of sexual practice for over a third of Americans, including homosexual and heterosexual men and women, both partnered and alone. Most people don't realize that anal intercourse is the least practiced form of anal play; stimulation with fingers, toys and tongues is far more common, partly because the prostate, the rectum and the rim of the anus are all rich sources of nerve endings. Gentle stimulation of these areas can be very pleasurable. Talk to your partner about anal sex and anal play. Find out his or her feelings on the subject. If he or she is adamantly opposed, back off for awhile. Try giving your partner a book on the subject. After he or she is better informed, your partner may be more willing to discuss integrating anal play into your relationship. Approach the subject carefully, and be very aware of your partner's feelings. Many women are embarrassed about anal sex, but have been longing to try it for a long time. Likewise, many men are extremely eager to experiment with this new form of play (as receivers and givers), yet remain convinced their partners would never consider it. Talk to each other about your desires. You may have more in common than you think! 100% Discreet, Privacy Guaranteed!
Anal Play Anal
Intercourse · Use a condom. Never go from anus to mouth, or anus to vagina, without washing carefully (and changing condoms) in between. · If the thought of some fecal matter is horribly repulsive to you, the receptive partner can use an enema beforehand. · The anus has no natural lubrication, so you'll need to use plenty of lubricant. · Relax and go slow. Encourage the receiving partner to take deep breaths and communicate his or her feelings aloud. · Start with external stimulation from something small, like a finger or a small vibrating toy. · Once the receiving partner has relaxed and begun to feel aroused, insert the finger or toy gently into the anus, letting the anal sphincter accommodate the object. · Gently move the object in a shallow circular motion. The two rims of the sphincter are rife with nerve endings, so this small motion should feel good. If it doesn't, stop or do something different. · When you are both ready to move on to something larger, consider using a small dildo or vibrator first. This will allow greater control and may make things easier for the receiving partner. · Once you are ready to introduce a penis or larger sex toy into the anus, slow down and proceed with caution. · Allow the receptive partner to set the depth and pace. · Breathe and concentrate on relaxing your anus. Keep communicating. · Don't neglect stimulation of other parts of the body. Clitoral or penis stimulation combined with anal play can be quite exciting. · Stop immediately if there is discomfort or if either partner says he or she wants to stop. · This should be an enjoyable experience. If it is not, stop. Anal Toys
The "Male G-Spot" Yes, there is a magic pleasure button in a man's body that, if stimulated, will produce amazing orgasms. It's easy to find and fun to touch -- if your idea of fun is hearing your man howl with pleasure! However, unlike its female counterpart, the "male G-Spot," correctly known as the "prostate gland," serves an important biological function. Prostate
Anatomy & Function The main function of the prostate is reproduction. The testicles produce sperm, the "little guys" that fertilize eggs. The vas deferens carries this sperm to the prostate, where it mixes with fluid from the prostate and seminal vesicles. When you have an orgasm, you ejaculate this fluid, which is comprised of 5% sperm and 95% seminal/prostate fluid. Prostate
Problems Although we know very little about what causes prostate cancer, the medical community has discovered much about how to diagnose it. The prostate produces a substance known as the Prostate Specific Antigen (PSA), a small amount of which continuously leaks into the bloodstream. High levels of PSA can be associated with prostate cancer. Doctors can easily test the level of PSA in your blood. However, some problems can only be diagnosed with a rectal exam, which is why you need a PSA blood test AND a rectal exam annually. While these exams are not foolproof, there is evidence that early detection can be helpful in preventing the spread of cancer. Prostate
Pleasures 1. Start with a hot shower so you and your partner will feel clean. 2. Don't just jump into prostate stimulation -- enjoy a little foreplay first! 3. Use lots of lubricant! Most couples report Anal Eze is best for this! 4. To find the prostate gland, reach down between your partner's legs, insert your index finger into the anus to the second knuckle and press forward, in a firm "come hither" motion. You'll be able to feel the prostate through the front part of the rectal wall. 5. Press gently. If you or your lover likes the sensation, press a little more firmly. You or your lover might enjoy a "shunting" sensation, experienced by smooth, rapid insertion and removal of one or more fingers. 6. Try using a sex toy! While many women's G-Spot toys work well for prostate stimulation, you'll also want to try some of the acrylic toys made specifically for anal play. If you opt to use a woman's G-Spot toy, be sure to select one with a wider safety base designed for harness or anal play. Also, if you've already used this toy on a woman for G-Spot stimulation, be sure to clean it and use a condom on it before inserting it for anal use. 7. If you find you don't enjoy the sensation of prostate stimulation alone, try pairing it with genital massage or oral sex. Your response to prostate stimulation depends on your particular physiology. Some men experience crashing orgasms when they stimulate their prostate glands, while others simply enjoy a great deal of pleasure. Some men don't enjoy the sensation at all, while others could take it or leave it. If you are unsure about your feelings toward this type of sensation, try it! If you don't like it, you don't have to do it again. Analingus: The Curious Lovers'
Guide to Oral-Anal Contact
Many lovers have an accidental introduction to analingus during cunnilingus, since the bottom of the vaginal entrance is quite close to the anus. Sometimes a little lick meant for the lower vagina slips further south than intended, and the recipient experiences unexpected delight -- and sometimes a surprisingly powerful urge to explore analingus further. For other lovers, interest in rimming develops from anal play. The most popular anal activities are sphincter massage and fingering, and many people also enjoy butt plugs and penis-anus intercourse. But as people explore other forms of anal eroticism, many warm up to the idea of analingus. Another Way to
Play Rimming may not ever become as popular as oral sex, but in recent years Americans have become somewhat more sexually experimental. In fact, surveys suggest that around fifteen percent of American adults -- more than twenty million people -- have experienced some form of anal sex play. There are no statistics specifically on rimming, but as people become more comfortable with sexual experimentation in general, and anal play in particular, it should come as no surprise that many heterosexuals and homosexuals alike are expressing curiosity about analingus. Why Analingus
Feels Erotic Another reason anal stimulation feels erotic is the pelvic floor muscles, which lie beneath the surface of the anal area. These muscles play an important role in sex and are the ones that contract during orgasm. Using a sex toy, finger or tongue to massage or insert into the anus stimulates the pelvic floor muscles and heightens overall erotic sensations. Finally, sex draws a good deal of its emotional power from lovers' wholehearted acceptance of each other. Analingus involves acceptance of an area that's often not accepted -- in fact, one that's usually rejected. Analingus becomes a way for the giver to say: " I love all of you. No part of your wonderful body turns me off." And it's a way for the receiver to say:" I'm totally yours. No part of me is off limits to you." This level of mutual acceptance can be a powerful turn-on. Raising The
Issue
If you and your lover have open and frank sexual communication, you might simply announce that you'd like to try analingus. On the other hand, if you feel reluctant to admit your interest -- the case for many -- you might raise the issue indirectly, perhaps by mentioning offhandedly that you read something about it on Intimate Delights / Planet Delights and asking what your lover thinks of it. If your honey grimaces, chances are that analingus won't become part of your intimate repertoire. Never pressure a lover to try rimming if he or she doesn't want to. But if your lover shows any interest, even if it's couched in skepticism and concern about hygiene, you may detect enough of an opening to pursue the issue, allay your lover's concerns and perhaps introduce it into your lovemaking. If you decide to experiment with analingus, you also need to discuss who's interested in which role. Some people are interested in only one side of a rimming interaction; others feel equally comfortable in both roles. Before you begin, be sure you're clear on who does what. The Big Fear:
Fecal Contact However, careful personal hygiene minimizes exposure. San Francisco sex therapist Jack Morin, Ph.D., author of the now-classic Anal Pleasure & Health, insists that the anus, anal canal and rectum usually contain surprisingly little stool. Most fecal material is stored above the rectum in the descending colon. When stool moves into the rectum, you feel "the urge," and it then passes out of the body fairly quickly. Most of the time, when you feel no urge to defecate, there are only trace amounts of stool in the rectum, anal canal and anus -- traces that can easily be washed out. The Infection
Connection The digestive tract might also contain other harmful micro-organisms that can be spread during oral-anal contact. Among them: · Other bacteria. Two significant germs are Shigella and Salmonella, which cause food poisoning. These germs can cause acute and often vicious diarrhea, and it's possible for someone with mild symptoms to transmit the infection to someone else who develops severe symptoms. · Intestinal parasites, notably Giardia lamblia, and amoebas, both of which cause diarrhea. · Viruses, notably HIV (the AIDS virus) and the one that causes hepatitis A. HIV typically spreads through blood-to-blood contact. Anal tissue bleeds easily, particularly in the estimated one-third of American adults who have hemorrhoids. (These varicose veins of the anal canal sometimes cause pain, but frequently do not, so affected individuals may not know they have them.) If HIV-contaminated blood enters the mouth of a someone who has a minor injury -- bleeding gums, for example -- the infection might be transmitted. Fun Without
Fear · Wash thoroughly. Before any sexual encounter involving oral-anal play, the area around and inside the anus should be carefully washed with soap and water. · Consider showering together. Washing is good, but showering together is even better. Not only is it sensual foreplay, but you can both make sure everything is clean and ready to go. · Consider an enema. For an extra margin of hygiene safety, the recipient might want to try an enema before washing. Enemas rinse the rectum and anal canal, removing most traces of fecal material. They're easy to use, especially the disposable enemas available over the counter from pharmacies. Simply insert the flexible nozzle into the anus while on your hands and knees and gently squeeze the bottle, pushing the fluid into the rectum. After a few minutes, sit on the toilet and allow the fluid to drain out. The bottle can be refilled with warm water and reused. · Dam it. Dental dams are thick sheets of latex rubber that work like a condom, acting as a physical barrier between the anus and the mouth. They may feel awkward to use at first, but, like condoms, they can be incorporated into analingus easily with a little practice and a sense of humor. Dental dams are available at most pharmacies, or you can simply buy unlubricated condoms or latex gloves and cut them into flat sheets. In a pinch, you can also use plastic food wrap. To heighten pleasure, massage a little sexual lubricant into your lover's anus before applying the dam. · Rinse after. After analingus without a dam, be sure to rinse your mouth with an antiseptic mouthwash or, at the very least, water. In truly monogamous couples, where both people are confident that neither has hepatitis, HIV or intestinal parasites, the only real risk of analingus is contact with digestive bacteria -- and enemas and careful washing virtually eliminates this. According to Dr. Morin, for healthy, monogamous couples who practice careful anal hygiene, the risk of analingus causing infection or illness is "extremely low." Consider your situation carefully. Discuss it. Then decide for yourselves the appropriate level of precautions you want to take. Analingus
Techniques and Tips · Knees and elbows. The person receiving pleasure assumes the position typically used for rear-entry (doggie style) intercourse, while his or her lover kneels or squats behind. Either partner may gently spread the cheeks to expose the anus. · Standing bent over. The person on the receiving end stands and bends at the waist, and his or her partner kneels, sits or squats behind. · Lying supine. The person being licked lies on his or her back, legs bent, knees drawn up to the chest or apart, while the other lover squats or lies on his or her stomach. It often helps in this position to place a pillow under the recipient's hips, which raises the anus and allows for easier access. · Sixty-nine. Compared with mutual oral-genital contact, mutual analingus requires somewhat more physical flexibility, but many people enjoy this position. Once you're both in position for analingus, here are some tips on technique: · Take it slow. Some recipients enjoy having their partner plunge into analingus. But unless they specifically request it, you should approach this highly sensitive area slowly. Massage, kiss, and lick the person's lower back, thighs, hips, and buttocks as you slowly work your way towards his or her anus. A slow approach builds anticipation for what's about to happen and often heightens the eroticism of analingus. · Use your lips. Kiss your lover's anus and the area around it. · Use the flat of your tongue. Press it against your partner's anus. · Use the tip of your tongue. Wiggle it around the anus, slip it inside and move it in and out or wiggle it around in circles. From Rimming to
Other Forms of Anal Play Whatever you and your lover ultimately decide about analingus, discussing it can deepen the intimacy you share. You will learn more about yourself and each other. You will become clearer about what you're willing and unwilling to try. In the end, as it were, these discussions will help you feel closer to one another and better able to experience whatever sexual pleasure you both enjoy. |
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